A Letter To Women Who Are Still Undecided On Motherhood

“Think about it: who the hell promotes a permanent life decision that can cause infections, miscarriage, anemia, hypertension, hair loss, nausea, postpartum depression, gestational diabetes, and even death because they care oh-so-much about you?”

Dear Undecided Goddess,

I cannot tell you what to make of such a drastic choice in your life, as it is not my choice to make. But I will lay out some cautionary measures you should take as you grow closer and closer towards making your decision. I will also provide some harsh truths that may piss you off, but I am willing to risk the backlash.

I can admit that I am the Queen of Cynicism, but I would rather you be pissed off and armed with sound advice and information than continue listening to fucked up people who are secretly jealous of you, as they didn’t exercise their options and took the plunge into parenthood just to shut their loved ones up. Now they are stuck and unhappy in marriages to spouses they hate and in parental roles they resent. They resort to cheating, alcohol, drugs, and other vices to keep them somewhat engaged with the “family of their dreams.” And unfortunately, we have lost some women who died in the delivery room trying to fulfill this dream.