Is My Neighbor An Exhibitionist?!

“Who pees on their own property that they pay for?!”

On this gloomy yet beautiful Sunday afternoon I decided to take a stroll around my neighborhood. For context, I live in a gated community.

As I was making my way up towards the gate, my two eyes noticed a strange yet familiar sighting that made me cut my walk short by crossing the street and making my way back home to divert my attention away from the unthinkable.

My neighbor was taking a piss outside of his home. He had his pants down with his aim positioned at the side of his own house!

I mean, who the hell does that? Who pees on their own property that they pay for?!

Now before you think I am jumping to conclusions, I know that man lives there, as I have seen him many times sitting in his backyard drinking a beer. I’ve also had to witness him repeating the same piss-poor behavior (pun intended) of today, which involves him draining his lizard outside for the world to see instead of taking a few seconds to go inside and use his own bathroom!

This man lives in a pretty large home. I am sure he has a minimum of 2.5–3 bathrooms that he can choose from. And yet he decides that the best way to fix the leak is to do so outside in nature.