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Lost & Found: Embracing Maturity, Adventure, And Self-Actualization Through Getting Older

Sanni Lark
4 min readApr 9, 2024

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Living to see a few more birthdays changed everything around for the better!

Credit: Anna Shvets via Pexels

While the world praises youth, and the vitality and energy that is supposed to accommodate us when we are young, dumb, and full of cum, I hated my younger years. I didn’t know who the fuck I was when I was younger. I didn’t know what I wanted. I couldn’t pinpoint what I truly deserved.

This inner confusion and turmoil showed up in my face. I suffered from severe acne, scars, blemishes, and breakouts. My self-hate revealed itself in the way I treated my body. I refused to exercise. I binged on all sorts of candy, chips, donuts, bagels, pizza, and ultra-processed food. My femininity was nonexistent. I was short-tempered and I got into a lot of arguments and fights because I was mad at the world. I had no sense of style and I wore baggy clothes to hide the same body I hated. My mind was cloudy, fatigued, and seriously depressed. My relationships reflected my need to please every damn body because I was seeking love in others that I couldn’t find in myself.

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Sanni Lark
Sanni Lark

Written by Sanni Lark

Channeling sacred, unadulterated, feminine chaos and wisdom through writing. For more primordial womanhood activation visit: https://www.sannilark.com

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