Member-only story
Mantra: “I Am Safe.”
“I am safe enough to never rush.”
“Come upstairs and I’ll show you…
Where my demons hide from you.”
Lost & Found, Lianne La Havas
It is a beautiful, sunny Friday afternoon. For the first time this week I stepped outside to do some light exercise. I was pacing back and forth on my balcony, simultaneously listening to my own thoughts and my neighbor’s dog barking at me.
The sun hugging my skin caused me to ask myself why I spent the entire week cooped up in my bedroom? The bitter cold is gone until next year, and the monotonous, sunshine-filled days are back again. I didn’t have much excuse to not break away from binge-watching House to get some Vitamin D. But I already knew the answer.
My bedroom is the only place I feel safe.
There is something about being enclosed within four walls with pieces of comfort and familiarity scattered throughout that makes me never want to leave. My Burberry and Marc Jacobs perfumes sit on my wooden dresser, along with a photo of my late grandmother. To get to my lipstick red mini fridge I have to walk past my seafoam green sno-cone maker. This appliance obviously belongs in the kitchen but I prefer it to be in my room. My first purchase of 2022 was a small steam tent that is installed across from my bed. It is one of my…
