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Patriarchal Success & Suffering: Why Cheating-Ass Husbands Refuse To Get A Divorce

Sanni Lark
5 min readDec 4, 2022

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“In our culture which values the keeping up of appearances more than the emotional state and well-being of the individual, this family man with the smiling wife and well-behaved children is much easier to trust than the single bachelor who refuses to grow up.”

Credit: Cottonbro via Pexels

In a previous article I wrote about infidelity, I discussed how lust and the thrill of being sexually cunning and getting away with it answers the pressing question on the hearts of people who have been cheated on, as many of these hurt individuals are searching for logical explanations as to why their partner stepped out of the relationship. And I am sure these same people would be curious to understand why anyone would rather maintain a secret affair than get a divorce and love their mistress or lover openly.

In this article I want to focus on the men, and delve into the simple yet complex reason why some husbands refuse to initiate a divorce even when the love they had for their wives no longer exists. They would rather maintain two (or more) relationships: one supports their public identity as a man, and the other nurturing their innermost self who wants to be free from the pressures, expectations, and roles the primary traditional identity of masculinity with the wife and kids he lives against his will.

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Sanni Lark
Sanni Lark

Written by Sanni Lark

Channeling sacred, unadulterated, feminine chaos and wisdom through writing. For more primordial womanhood activation visit: https://www.sannilark.com

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