Sorry Ladies, But Men Do Not Owe You Marriage

“As a sovereign woman who prizes her own freedom above everything else, I do understand and even respect men who don’t allow anyone to determine when or if they should be husbands. Even if the persons being frustrated and getting the short end of the stick are indeed women.”

“There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.”

-Woody Allen

I have witnessed firsthand the vitriol some ladies have for single men who refuse to settle down and permanently commit, especially in the online arena. Videos are being shared, social media groups are created in droves, and women all over the world are engaging in conversation surrounding the men who refuse to get married; either within a certain time frame or they’re forgoing becoming husbands altogether.

I observe quietly, as I was never informed that men owed women the dreams they’ve been conditioned to desire since childhood. We all know there is a vast discrepancy in how little boys and girls are raised. But for some reason grown women believe that men are supposed to automatically get with their program, which includes willingly abandoning their lives of singleness to become family men, all without complaining or missing their autonomy.

From boyhood, men are taught to value and prioritize their independence much more than women. In addition, I believe that men hold less guilt when it comes to putting themselves first, even if it means that the women who are ready to change their last names have to wait a bit longer for the man-folk to catch up. As a sovereign woman who prizes her own freedom above everything else, I do understand and even respect men who don’t allow anyone to determine when or if they should be husbands. Even if the persons being frustrated and getting the short end of the stick are indeed women.

It was very late into the night when I decided to click on a YouTube video of two black men who were exploring the beautiful city of Mérida in Yucatán, Mexico. Neither of them seemed to be in committed relationships, and I thought it was wonderful that two guy friends made the decision to pack their bags and travel just for the sake of exploration and fun, all while documenting their adventures which can result in a…