The Unhealthy Dose Of Romance That Hollywood Tries To Spoon Feed Me On A Regular Basis

“The Hollywood industry uses its influence to persuade us that we are incomplete without a partner. Movie directors are actually romance peddle pushers. Because couples spend a lot of fucking money and fuel our economy in a way that single, childfree people could never pull off. It’s all a very successful capitalist agenda.”

I grew up in the Seventh Day Adventist church, and my upbringing dictated that my brother and I were not allowed to go to the movies in our free time. I was 18 years old when I finally popped my movie-going cherry to accompany my friend downtown to the AMC theatre on a Sunday afternoon. The experience was lack-luster at best. It turns out that I wasn’t missing out on anything.

As an adult I am pretty much detached from the American pastime of taking frequent trips to the movies every time Hollywood decides they want to make more money for shooting motion pictures featuring the same A-list actors. I actually find it bizarre to spend upwards of $20.00 every time I have nothing better to do than to sit in a freezing cold, dark room (with stale popcorn and old, sticky soda sprinkled across the floors; gross) and allocate my attention to a huge screen for almost three hours. I find the whole ordeal to be quite boring.